{"id":2058,"date":"2023-05-25T04:12:47","date_gmt":"2023-05-25T04:12:47","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/blog.villages.com.au\/?p=2058"},"modified":"2023-05-25T04:17:09","modified_gmt":"2023-05-25T04:17:09","slug":"tackling-grief-in-seniors-living-communities","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/blog.villages.com.au\/lifestyle\/tackling-grief-in-seniors-living-communities\/","title":{"rendered":"Tackling grief in seniors living communities"},"content":{"rendered":"\t\t<div data-elementor-type=\"wp-post\" data-elementor-id=\"2058\" class=\"elementor elementor-2058\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-top-section elementor-element elementor-element-6fa21db elementor-section-boxed elementor-section-height-default elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"6fa21db\" data-element_type=\"section\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-100 elementor-top-column elementor-element elementor-element-0f4b5e3\" data-id=\"0f4b5e3\" data-element_type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-00f8214 elementor-drop-cap-yes elementor-drop-cap-view-stacked elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"00f8214\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-settings=\"{&quot;drop_cap&quot;:&quot;yes&quot;}\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t<style>\/*! elementor - v3.15.0 - 20-08-2023 *\/\n.elementor-widget-text-editor.elementor-drop-cap-view-stacked .elementor-drop-cap{background-color:#69727d;color:#fff}.elementor-widget-text-editor.elementor-drop-cap-view-framed .elementor-drop-cap{color:#69727d;border:3px solid;background-color:transparent}.elementor-widget-text-editor:not(.elementor-drop-cap-view-default) .elementor-drop-cap{margin-top:8px}.elementor-widget-text-editor:not(.elementor-drop-cap-view-default) .elementor-drop-cap-letter{width:1em;height:1em}.elementor-widget-text-editor .elementor-drop-cap{float:left;text-align:center;line-height:1;font-size:50px}.elementor-widget-text-editor .elementor-drop-cap-letter{display:inline-block}<\/style>\t\t\t\t<p>I<strong>n every senior\u2019s living community, a high proportion of residents will be experiencing grief in one form or another. How can operators help residents at this challenging stage of life?<\/strong><\/p><p>It\u2019s an uncomfortable reality that for many residents in senior living communities, grief is a part of life.<\/p><p>Whether it be the loss of a partner, moving out of the family home, or the realisation they are in the final stages of their life, complex emotions will often accompany the move into a seniors\u2019 community. Living with an older cohort also comes with challenges \u2013 residents die, which will always have ripple effect in a community.<\/p><h3><strong>WHAT IS GRIEF?<\/strong><\/h3><p>Grief is the feeling we experience when we lose something significant, says former grief counsellor Peter Wilson, who is a resident of Brisbane\u2019s Samford Grove retirement village.<\/p><blockquote><p>\u201cIt might be the loss of a dream, the loss of a career, the loss of a house, the loss of a community, and, of course, a death,\u201d Peter said.<\/p><\/blockquote><h3><strong>MOVING INTO A SENIORS\u2019 COMMUNITY<\/strong><\/h3><p>Moving into a senior\u2019s living community can cause grief, said Peter.<\/p><p>\u201cI don\u2019t think people really understand the grief you go through when you must sell up, leave your family home, come to somewhere you don\u2019t know, and give away all those family connections. It\u2019s a huge loss,\u201d said Peter, who moved to Samford Grove two years ago.<\/p><p>Though he is content today, the move to a retirement community triggered feelings of loss for Peter, and he could see others around him were experiencing similar emotions.<\/p><p>\u201cYou\u2019ve got to start all over again making new friends \u2013 it\u2019s really, really tough,\u201d he said.<\/p><p>Peter, who retired five years ago and is 76, said older people are also often \u201cdisenfranchised\u201d.<\/p><p>\u201cOlder people aren\u2019t respected like they used to be,\u201d he said.<\/p><p>As they approach the end of their lives, older people also often look back and begin to wonder about the meaning of their life.<\/p><p><strong>\u201cSo, there are a lot of issues that can cause real despair,\u201d <\/strong>he said.<\/p><p>A committed Christian, Peter spent decades working as a counsellor of various types, including roles as a nurse, grief counsellor, in the funeral industry, a crisis support worker, and eventually retraining and working as a psychologist and psychotherapist.<\/p><blockquote><p>Having purpose and dignity are what help older people cope, Peter said.<\/p><\/blockquote><h3><strong>Are providers doing enough to support residents coping with grief<\/strong><\/h3><p>Five Good Friends is a Queensland-based home care provider that offers concierge services bringing activities, conversations, and education into seniors\u2019 communities.<\/p><p>When Give Good Friends visited Samford Grove, and began talking to Peter, together they saw an opportunity to assist residents with discussion groups around life-changing experiences.<\/p><p>Peter said, \u201cI started out in 1971, and I\u2019ve got a PhD and academic work behind me, and I\u2019m sitting here twiddling my thumbs. I thought, well, this is crazy. It\u2019s almost selfish because I\u2019ve got this experience and this training and there are others out there who could benefit.<\/p><p>\u201cInstead of sitting here twiddling my thumbs, doing nothing, I\u2019d like to do something that\u2019s of value.\u201d<\/p><p>Initially the groups will be held at Samford Grove, but Peter hopes the sessions \u201cplant a seed\u201d and he could extend the sessions to other communities where Five Good Friends are helping.<\/p><p>The first discussion groups will be based on the topics of making new friends \u2013 what hinders us from reaching out to people, overcoming shyness, and so on \u2013 managing loss in life, how to start a new chapter in a new setting.<\/p><h3><strong>LIFE SKILLS<\/strong><\/h3><p>Simon Lockyer, co-founder and CEO of Five Good Friends, said moving into a seniors\u2019 community is a major life change and can cause residents to experience a complex range of emotions \u2013 both negative and positive.<\/p><p>\u201cThe resident might have planned on the move, but they might also have had to move from living in the family home, they might have lost a partner, or they are moving into a community where they don\u2019t know anyone, and for some residents the move is a signal that this is the last chapter,\u201d said Simon.<\/p><p>\u201cIt\u2019s a complete change of life,\u201d he said.<\/p><p>Often when they are out talking to residents, Simon said they tell them that after their first two or three nights in the community, new residents will wake in the morning thinking, \u2018What have I done?\u2019<\/p><p>\u201cBut six months down the track, they\u2019re like, \u2018I wish I made this decision earlier\u2019,\u201d Simon said.<\/p><p>Acknowledging those feelings of loss and grief, and learning some strategies to cope with them, could help to make that transition easier for new residents.<\/p><h3><strong>REACH OUT<\/strong><\/h3><p>Peter has one piece of advice for residents who might be suffering.<\/p><p>\u201cReach out for help. Most people don\u2019t need professional help.<\/p><p>\u201cI put it to you that 80% of people\u2019s issues can be dealt with by a sensitive good friend \u2013 a family member or a friend \u2013 and tell your story.\u201d<\/p><p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.theweeklysource.com.au\/hidden-suffering-tackling-grief-in-seniors-living-communities\/\">https:\/\/www.theweeklysource.com.au\/hidden-suffering-tackling-grief-in-seniors-living-communities\/<\/a><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>In every senior\u2019s living community, a high proportion of residents will be experiencing grief in one form or another. How can operators help residents at this challenging stage of life? It\u2019s an uncomfortable reality that for many residents in senior living communities, grief is a&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2059,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"content-type":"","om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_mi_skip_tracking":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[72,18],"tags":[74,101],"class_list":["post-2058","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-health","category-lifestyle","tag-aged-care","tag-health"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.villages.com.au/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2058","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.villages.com.au/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.villages.com.au/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.villages.com.au/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.villages.com.au/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2058"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/www.villages.com.au/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2058\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2071,"href":"https:\/\/www.villages.com.au/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2058\/revisions\/2071"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.villages.com.au/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/2059"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.villages.com.au/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2058"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.villages.com.au/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2058"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.villages.com.au/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2058"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}